Thursday, May 4, 2006

Oh glorious day!

Imagine this padawan learner's unadulterated bliss upon learning that come September 12, he will own the classic Star Wars trilogy on DVD. Not the Special Edition, no extra scenes or shots at all, just the original 1977, 1980, and 1983 theatrical releases of the films. We finally got George to break down! I thought this day would never come; I've hoped and prayed for it, and now after long years of CG Sarlacc pits and revised Greedos it is finally going to happen. I was just wondering two days ago if this would ever happen. I thought, "No way while George has control over it. Maybe when he joins the ethereal mysteries of the Force, God forbid this ever happening, his estate might finally release them." But he finally caved and we simple members of Nerdom have our victory! Praise be to the Father Anakin, the Son Luke, and the Holy Force!

A list of Special Edition extras I won't be missing:

- Greedo shooting first

- That atrocious Jabba scene in the hangar

- Ian McDiarmid replacing the old woman who played the Emperor in ESB

- The Star Wars music video in Jabba's palace (I so loved the song that Max Rebo's Band originally played)

- The cruel fate of Oola the dancing Twi'lek (one could have guessed from the screams issuing from the Rancor pit)

- Boba Fett pimping bitches

- The Sarlacc with the beak and CG tentacles

- Han Solo's dumb revised line as he rescues Lando; the original "Trust me" had so much irony and meaning after Lando's sellout of Han

- The score at the end of ROTJ that replaced the original Ewok tribal song (some of my favorite music of the films)

As you can see there is a running theme here with ROTJ; the Special Edition of that movie sucked hard core.

However, there are a few Special Edition treats that I enjoy.

- Dewbacks!

- some of the expanded Mos Eisley shots

- more shots of the Wampa ice creature

- expanded look at Cloud City with the pink sunsets

- the shot of the Bantha herd as Jabba's Sail Barge flies past

Now if we can only get them to release the theatrical version of TPM that they tried to cover up. Damn you Rick McCallum!