The train wreck continues

The email...

Yo Whitney,
how's it going? Hope you had a good weekend. Listen, I know you said you'd let me know if you got free this week to do something, but don't worry about it. I'm most likely going to be out of town for Memorial Day and more importantly I just don't feel like I'm getting a real good vibe from you. You're pretty much the only cool person I ended up meeting thru match and you seem like you would be a really fun person to hang out with or hit up a Sox game with, but I'm just getting too many mixed signals from you. I kind of feel like you were a bit prejudiced against me from the start for some reason (from the South, not into the club scene, don't live within Boston city limits?) and never gave me much of a chance. I'm not gonna lie; I was pretty surprised and put off when you jetted after only like 30 minutes when we got together at Tia's. I didn't want to say anything, but I noticed your friend from your pictures online follow you into the bathroom and figured you guys were doing some girl pow-wow since you were in there so long. I honestly thought you had just left. So if you thought I was nervous or uncomfortable that's probably why. I'm pretty blunt and straight-forward; I would have much rather you simply came out and told me you weren't having a good time or thought I was funny-looking or something. I understand if you had to catch your friend's birthday, but it came out sounding like you guys cooked up a story to get out of the date. Anyway, no hard feelings and I hate to sound accusing, but that's just what I gathered from it. I thought maybe I was over-analyzing everything when you said you'd like to play mini-golf or get together again, but you seem to always be too busy. I think you are a nice girl and I would have liked to get to know you a little bit better, but I don't go in for much of the cat-and-mouse games and you seemed a little immature and insincere. Sorry if I'm a bit harsh; like I said, just telling it how I see it. Anyway, once again no hard feelings; it's all part of dating I guess. Good luck and have a good summer.

Peace out,
The Dunce Cap Marvel

The response...

ok, wow, back off a little, eh? i don't know where all this is coming from, feeling a bit defensive and decide its ok to take it out on me? someone u've met once? you wrote that i give you mixed signals? yet you say im cool one sentence, then hate on me the next. whats up with that? and what are u talking about prejudice?? i believe i conveyed that i thought it was ballsy that u moved up here alone - u were saying how much u hate the south, not i. i don't think i ever said anything about the club scene?? and i just was saying that i love boston, the city is awesome, i'm a city person. we met for like an hour, which is a pretty fair amount of time for a first date. i don't want to spend 12 hrs with someone right off the bat. if you don't or didn't want to come into the city, well no one held a gun to your head. this is where i live and where i like to hang out. you say that you don't want to play games? well not telling me how i feel in the moment but then sending me some haterade email seems like games to me. and wtf, i had to pee! if my friend also uses the bathroom at that time, or follows me in, i can't control that. you just came off waaaay paranoid. i've been myself in all emails we've shared and in person. you don't seem to "get" me all that well, and honestly, sounds like you've got some hang ups - those of which i don't want to be the scapegoat to. it's a first date with someone you havent met yet for hecks sake! i was nervous, not embarassed to say it. i feel like u put way too much pressure on it and had all these expectations, which i'm not down for. you don't believe that i have to work on weekends? well i'm not gonna defend myself there. that's ur problem. you're very rude to judge me saying u think i'm insincere and immature. then say sorry for being harsh yada yada yada. talk about insincere and immature. if i got an email like the one you sent i wouldn't want to have anything to do with that person again. oh wait, i did. and oh wait, i dont.

Bloody rejection

I had my first date in about two years tonight. I wasn't shooting for anything crazy, my expectations were mostly held in check; I just wanted to go out, have a nice conversation, maybe have a good enough time with the girl to have a shot at a follow-up. I might as well have signed up to go on Elimidate; I lasted approximately 47 minutes.

Trouble started brewing at work when I was told I could not wear shorts and a pink shirt out to a date. Hey, news to me. I spent a frantic and nerve-wracking two hour lunch at the mall buying a pair of khakis and looking everywhere for a pair of decent shoes to wear with them. I ended up spending almost $100 so I opted to stick with the pink shirt.

I took the train into the city to meet this girl down by Fanueil Hall at 8 pm. I have to say I cut a striking figure in my snappy new khakis and Timberland loafers. I even tucked in my shirt for only the 17th time in my lifetime. Unfortunately, wearing shoes without socks (which I almost never do) gave me mad blisters and tore off all the skin on my left pinkie toe and heel, so I ended up limping over to the waterfront looking like Long John Silver.

I met her at the cocktail bar a quarter of and my nervousness settled down pretty quickly. Real cute/pretty girl, tall as all heck, and great hair. We had a drink and talked for about 20 minutes. Almost the first thing out of her mouth was, "wow, pink shirt, huh?" Still, it seemed like everything was going well: good convo, no awkward pauses, laughs, good times had by all. She got up to go to the restroom and this Sherlock Jr. noticed a girl following her in that had been in her profile pictures online. So her and this friend end up spending like 15 minutes squirreled away; I guess she thought things weren't going well and needed an exit strategy....

Anyway she came back and I could tell she wanted to leave so things got weird and the strange silences started cropping up and I got nervous as hell. After about another 10 minutes of half-hearted conversation she let me know she was leaving to go celebrate her friend's birthday, and that was that. Uncomfortable good-bye and all, I probably had about 30 or so minutes of face time with this girl. Walking off into the night, I honestly expected to have to give a testimonial to some cameraman following me or something. So I was pretty fucking bummed and pissed off. A whole lot of hassle and stressing and expense for what amounted to nothing more than a quick, we'll-squeeze-you-into-our-busy-schedule audition. Not to mention that my left ankle looked like Curt Schilling's in the 2004 ALCS.

I don't know; not a great confidence booster for my first time throwing myself back out there. Not sure how I feel about continuing with the match.com deal. I've emailed about 10 different girls and this was the only one I had really heard back from. We had been chatting and exchanging emails for the past three weeks so I figured I was doing OK and had a shot, but I guess she decided otherwise. I just wish I could have had a real date, instead of that waste of time. I ended up coming home and buying a bottle of champagne to celebrate the futility of my manhood.

Game ball goes to Joey Votto. If he hadn't hit those three homers today I think I would be much more depressed than I am now. Thanks for looking out for me buddy.