Monday, December 4, 2006

My circadian rhythms are bumpin'

MASSACHUSETTAN...MASSACHUSETTER...MASSACHUSETTITE?
In case you've been AWOL for the past few months -- oh wait, no that was me -- and out of the loop, I have a new state. I am now a resident of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, a Bay Stater. At least that's what the quickly disappearing numbers on my paycheck say. And Boston sports fans aside, I have been pretty pleased with my new environs.

Everything here is old. Whether in Boston or here on the North Shore, there is a vibrant living history about the place. It helps to have Salem right down the street, where the centuries-old houses feature plates that name the carpenter and original occupant. Built in 1794 by Ebeneezer So-and-so for Captain Proctor and his Wyfe. It would not surprise me in the least if I were to meet Hester Prynn or Ishmael meandering down the cobbled backstreets or out by Pickering Wharf. I can stand on Essex Bridge, spanning the waters between Salem and Beverly, and look out past the harbor and to the sea, imagining what it would be like to be some ancient Narragansett standing among the eaves of green, virgin forest and seeing European masts on the horizon for the first time.

I have to also say that Beverly has a most excellent cemetary. Strange as it may be, I love cemetaries. I spent late Saturday afternoon walking along the rows of marble headstones and moss-grown crypts quietly musing to myself. Perhaps it's a bit dark, but it is magical to be a living, breathing person and surrounded by the houses of the dead, briefly touching the stones and imagining who these people were, what their histories are. I hiked to the top of the high hill at the east end to admire the large W_ family mauseleum that squatted there amongst perfectly eldritch trees, drinking in the atmosphere the entire time and loving it. I left with dusk giving way to night, daring the dark to come but equally wishing not to get caught locked in, inventing morbid little vampire stories the whole way out.

MY, BUT AREN'T YOU A PLEASANT PSYCHOPATH?
I get to visit with the psychiatrist and have a nice long chat about my brain-fever and melancholy in a couple of weeks. I must say that I am thrilled. I get to find out what exactly my problem is and possibly be diagnosed as clinically depressed, bi-polar, manic-depressive, or simply just "certifiable." Are you dripping with anxiety? I sure am.

GOOD GOD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY CHILDHOOD!?
I'm sure that there are people who will be beating down the cinema doors to see this crap and next year's 'Transformers', but I honestly don't know why. Eighties cartoons do not good films make. My childhood was great, but it is just that, my childhood. I am now in adulthood, or some quasi-changeling state in between the two. I have good memories of 'He-Man' and 'G.I. Joe' but other than the odd 'Family Guy' reference I'm not all that interested in revisting them. Half of the cartoons are just so bad they are unbearable to watch anyway (Thundercats, anyone?). Not too mention that Hollywood has plans in the works for a new Pee-Wee Herman movie, a 'Fraggle Rock' movie that is set in the 'real world', and a 'Dark Crystal' sequel. Count me out...unless they decide to tackle an R-rated Teddy Ruxpin flick. I can see it now -- Teddy Ruxpin & Grubby Meet the Glowworms!

4 comments:

Eric Roberts said...

In researching my travel stops, I noticed that you were previously wired across town. Smells like heartbreak to me.

But anyway, i'm gonna be in the neighborhood pretty soon. We should hang out.

They wouldn't permit me to look at your blog in the pen. I'm sure glad I haven't missed too many posts. How's your life been?

Anonymous said...

in the pen...?

I want to see Dark Crystal redux.
I want to see Charlotte's Web

They give me closure

The Dunce Cap Marvel said...

Closure? That's ridiculous...is the American public so infatuated with its cultural history that it can't move on? Are you that unhappy with the memories and representations of 'Dark Crystal' and 'Charlotte's Web' that you have that you need new ones every few decades? Is this the best that Hollywood and our best cultural minds can give us? Recycled ideas from our childhoods 20 years later? If you want so-called "closure" then why not go back and revisit the source material yourself? Or would you rather propagate the American pandemic, laziness?

Anonymous said...

It is material that interests the public. I don't think we need ANOTHER Batman movie or Superman movie or Spiderman movie - but some crazy people out there think that is interesting becasue they grew up watching or reading the comics. X-Men was a great movie. I was excited to see it because I knew the X-men, I had a special place in my heart for the X-Men. It was fun, if a bit cheesy but movies are supposed to be fun. Quit judging. Making the Smurfs doesn't mean they won't have time to make Spidey 4.